Minimize the Effects of Divorce on Your Children!

"...In order to help protect your child from any fallout during the reorganization of your family, and to ensure that your child stays happy and well-adjusted throughout, it is important that you recognize, accept, and even embrace, certain concepts. Sometimes a parent has a hard time accepting these principles, because they run counter to what the parent wants for themselves. It's ok, and even normal, to feel that way; it's just not ok to act on those feelings to the detriment of your children."

"...It is critical to realize that children are very aware of and identify with both parents. Your child knows that half of who they themselves are comes from you, and half from their other parent. What does it mean to a child to be told that "your daddy is a no good so-and-so"? Do they think "daddy is a no good so-and-so, but mommy is good"? No! They think "half of who I am is a no good so-and-so, so I must be a no good so-and-so too". When a child hears "your mother is selfish and greedy" that child thinks "mommy is selfish and greedy, so I must be too"."

"...it may seem as if he doesn't care at all about the financial concerns of the mother, and is trying to get as much time with the children as possible in order to avoid paying high amounts of support. This is, however, rarely the motivating factor; in fact, most fathers going through the family law system feel that they must fight tooth and nail for time with their children because they feel as if they are being pushed out of their children's lives. These fathers genuinely fear losing all time and meaningful contact with their children."

"...There Are Some Things Which You Just Can't Do Anything About - Get Over It and Let It Go. There are many things which are mandatory in family law, with little room for variance. It is important to recognize these things, as fighting them will only frustrate you, and the Court. Once you recognize those things which you can't change, you can refocus your energies on those things which you can do something about! ...Some of these things are..."